Silly

I just finished a long workday and was about to walk out the door to swim, and then I remembered that I need to write something. I’m taking my chances with the weather, which is wildly erratic today, and the early evening sunshine that is still shining through the window behind me could give way to the threatened thunderstorms any minute, which would completely scuttle my swimming plans. Life is risky. 

Of all of the terrible things going on in the world today, from Haiti to Afghanistan to the parts of the United States that are falling victim to the latest Greek letter COVID variant, I’m worried about my weight. I know, it’s so petty and suburban white lady-ish to worry about how fat I am when others are hungry or sick or homeless or in imminent danger. But there it is. I’m a petty suburban white lady who’s carrying a few extra pounds. The extra weight doesn’t bother me as much as the state of the world bothers me. But I’d be lying if I said that it didn’t bother me at all. 

*****

It’s the next day now, and the sun continued to shine and the threatened thunderstorm did not materialize and the National Weather Service cancelled the tornado watch that had been in effect for much of the day. All of the weather hoopla turned out to be much ado about nothing. The water was lovely, and I swam my 800 meters, and I went on my way rejoicing.  

I’m technically working now. I’m listening in on a corporate call, but I’m also thinking through a project problem, and I’m making to-do lists, for the long and short term. I can multi-task like nobody’s business. 

Tomorrow is payday. I got promoted so I got a raise. It’s kind of a big promotion and kind of a small raise, but more money is more money and I’ll take it. I donate money every time I get paid, and so tomorrow, I’ll donate to the International Refugee Assistance Project (for Afghanistan) and Catholic Relief Services (for Haiti). Can I do more than that? I don’t know. I guess I can pray. I guess I can keep donating as much as I can and a little more because they need the money more than I do. I guess I can keep living my own little life and spend as much time being grateful and as little time complaining as possible. I can just swim without worrying about being too fat or looking silly in my bathing suit. Frog and the turtle and the mice and the dragonflies and the snakes can laugh their fool heads off.  

So what if I look funny in my bathing suit? SO WHAT?