Things always seem worse in the middle of the night, when you should be sleeping but you can't. Problems seem unsolvable. Weird things seem weirder. Scary things are much scarier. Things that would seem ridiculous in daylight seem possible, even likely, when you're alone in the dark.
I'm a city girl who doesn't relish any encounter with wild animals, small or large. But I live in the suburbs. and although Silver Spring is a pretty close-in, urbanized suburb, it's still home to lots of animals. And I'm a fair-minded person. As far as I'm concerned, it's their turf just as much as mine. I'm not thrilled to run into foxes in daylight, or swarming bats at dusk, or rocket-launched frogs; or snakes, real or imaginary. But I acknowledge their right to our shared habitat.
I have to draw the line somewhere, though. There are limits, you know?
A few days ago, a neighborhood friend posted a picture of a very large paw print in her backyard snow. And according to commenters on the post, the print belonged to a bear. And according to the Internet, bears are not at all unheard-of visitors in Silver Spring. And according to me, WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? What, as my 17-year-old son says, in the ACTUAL HELL?
I mean, really. Bats and squirrels and deer and raccoons and foxes? Fine. But bears? This isn't Yellowstone, for crying out loud. A bear. A BEAR.
Clearly, it was time to get off social media for the day, and so I did. And I didn't give the bear another thought. Until I woke up at 3 in the morning for my regularly scheduled anxiety attack, and realized that I could never again go outside unarmed. A BEAR! I've seen "The Revenant," and I am in no way equipped to survive a similar encounter with a bear in the wild, even if the wild is the DMV suburbs.
Having resolved never to leave the house on foot again, I went back to sleep. And then I woke up. And the sun was out. And the snow had melted, not completely, but enough that roaming bears wouldn't have had enough snow in which to leave a decent footprint. This made a difference, for some reason. Even if the bear was hiding somewhere, I wouldn't have to see its footprint. Out of sight, out of mind. So I went running, picking my way around the remaining patches of ice and noting likely options for shelter if the bear were to appear. And I returned home unscathed after an uneventful morning run.
*****
It's Monday now, so warm that the snow has completely melted, leaving mist to rise from the sidewalks in the bright sun this morning. Maybe a rodent is just as reliable a predictor of weather conditions as NOAA. And speaking of the wild kingdom, I haven't seen so much as a squirrel today. Not even a pigeon.
*****
Tuesday: I worked from home today. It's not my normal WFH day, but I wasn't feeling well. I don't have the kind of job that lets a sick person just rest and get better (who does?) but staying at home helps. I'm still not 100 percent, but I'm better than I was.
I'm torn about the State of the Union. On the one hand, I'd like to continue with my Trump embargo. I just don't want to look at his face or hear his voice. On the other hand, I want to maintain some level of informed-ness, some situational awareness. Plus it'll be fun to watch the reaction when he declares the state of emergency, as I expect he will.
I should call the White House. Maybe they can do something about the bear. Some sort of neighborhood enclosure, to keep the people on one side and the bear on the other. It doesn't have to be a wall; any sort of physical barrier will do. Steel slats, maybe, or a chain-link fence.
*****
Wednesday: So that was interesting. No state of emergency, and even the Democratic women in white were forced to applaud--standing, no less--when the President spoke about the record number of women in Congress. And even I was moved, once again, by the story of Alice Johnson. Criminal justice reform is long overdue, and if there's any reason to be hopeful, it's that even some of the most conservative Republicans are championing the idea that our incarceration rates represent a sinful waste of human life and potential. I'm happy for Ms. Johnson, and I'll give credit where it's due, even if it's due to Donald Trump and Jared Kushner and Kim Kardashian.
I fell asleep before the thing was over, and didn't get to see Stacey Abrams give the Democratic response. And the usual post-Trump-speech fact checks gave him better truthfulness ratings than he usually earns. Apparently, at least half of what he said was actually true.
On the other hand, he loses points for the "war and investigations" remark, which doesn't even make any sense. So it's a C-plus.
Yes, that's right, I'm giving Trump a C-plus. Factor that into his GPA, accounting for every other speech and public performance since January 2017, and he's still failing.
And if a bear wandering around Silver Spring isn't a damn national emergency, then I don't know what is.
*****
It's Thursday now, and a week into February. My trip to Ireland is just over a month away, and I'm figuring out how to pack. I thought about trying to manage the week with a carry-on alone, but I don't know. I have some planning to do.
And why does a kid jump into my seat on the couch every single time I get up?
I bought a travel handbag, and I'm not sure if I like it or not. I think I do. I want all of the handbags. It's a problem. Next week, I'll discuss my packing strategy and my obsessive-compulsive what-to-bring decision process. There might be flow charts, or maybe a Tableau visualization.
It would be nice to be one of those people who don't panic about every minor detail and who can take a trip without spending weeks worrying about what to bring and what to leave home.
But you know what? I almost completely forgot about the bear. Sometimes my gnat-like attention span and my obsessive overthinking work in my favor. There is always a silver lining.
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